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pedohelp® offering understanding & support to prevent chid sexual abuse pedohelp® pedohelp main menu skip to content accessible homepage home do you think this website is useful? facebook page ◹ youtube channel ◹ the project about the project project’s references contact make a donation ◹ learn faq publications ◹ statistics on child sexual abuse ◹ children ◹ parents professionals working with children health professionals inform act find help do you think this website is useful? english français deutsche español italian nederlands polski العربية offering understanding and support to prevent child sexual abuse you don’t choose your fantasies do you feel attracted to children, and are you afraid that you might go on to abuse a child? do your fantasies make you unhappy? do you feel confused? do you sometimes want to masturbate while looking at images of children? before committing an irreversible act or imprisoning yourself with feelings of shame, take the time to read this page. no shame, no taboo you are not responsible for your fantasies, and no fantasy is prohibited by law. but you are responsible for all of your choices and for all of your actions. pedophile urges don’t have to be forever. you have the right to enjoy a fulfilling sex life, and this site was created to help you. we will answer any question you might have about pedophilia or children’s sexuality without judgement or taboo. sign the charter be stronger than your urges. make a commitment right now to never abuse any child: sign the charter ◹ ask for help in many countries, there are professionals and associations that can help. ask for help . i want to have sex with a child do not be fooled by your own desires: no child ever wants sexual relations – not one, not ever. a child might tell you that they want to have sexual relations, or they might be scared to refuse because they want to please you. they might seek to have sexual relations with you because they have experienced something that disturbed or troubled them. your obligation as an adult or a teenager is to respond that sexual or romantic relationships with children are forbidden because they damage children, and children don’t know what they are doing. i feel the urge to masturbate while looking at images of children the exploitation of a child using their image is unacceptable. do not be fooled by the phony smile of a child who has been manipulated by adults. masturbating in front of these images makes you an accomplice to the sexual exploitation of their image. there is a very real risk of addiction and isolation. i would like to not be attracted to children anymore even if it feels right now that you can’t imagine a life without being attracted to children, you should be aware that many people have managed to overcome their urges with specialist help. an attraction to children is not inevitable. the important thing is not to isolate yourself with your urges or trap yourself into a troubling fantasy, or to believe that you are condemned to a life sentence of purely platonic sexuality. activate subtitles in english our publications questions and answers on pedophilia what is pedophilia and who is a pedophile? pedophiles are adolescent boys or girls or adult men or women who feel sexually attracted to prepubescent children (i.e. those who have not yet reached puberty). some pedophiles are attracted only to girls, others only to boys. some are attracted to both, and some are equally attracted to children and teenagers or adults. pedophilia exists everywhere, all around the world and in all environments regardless of wealth, education or religion. just because nobody talks about it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist! no one chooses to be a pedophile, and the vast majority of pedophiles will never abuse a child. no one is responsible for their fantasies, but everyone is responsible for their actions and their deeds. also, any sexual act involving a child is forbidden: it is forbidden to tell children that you are in love with them, to make remarks of a suggestive nature to them, to show them a pornographic image or to show them your own sexual organs or ask to see theirs, to watch them undress, caress them, touch their private parts (pubic area, buttocks, chest), to put them on your knees when you have an erection, thereby imposing upon them your own sexual desire… why is pedophilia so frightening? pedophilia is often wrongly defined as the act of sexually abusing children. in fact, pedophilia is not an act but a sexual attraction. pedophiles are neither monsters, nor sex offenders, nor child-murderers. they are people in pain who need help to overcome their fantasies or to live with their fantasies without actually assaulting a child. why does someone become a pedophile? there is a wide variety of reasons, and it depends on the personal history of each individual. some pedophiles have experienced violence in their childhood, which may or may not have been of a sexual nature. others were profoundly disturbed during the time that they were exploring their own sexuality, and others might have grown up in families in which the boundaries of intimacy and sex were not clearly established (we define these as an incestuous environment or family). once a pedophile, always a pedophile? having desire for children is a great affliction, but it is not a life sentence. many people no longer feel attracted to children after receiving therapy or support from a specialist. others learn to live with such fantasies without feeling that these fantasies are encroaching upon their day-to-day life. commit today to respecting the integrity of children by signing the pedohelp® charter! ◹ is that true an adult can fall in love with a child? a teenager or adult may experience feelings of love for a child but this should never lead to a sexual relationship, because it is impossible to share love and sexual desire with children. this is because children are not yet mature enough to understand this kind of thing, and a sexual relationship is always damaging to a child even when there is tenderness, love and gentleness. when a pubescent person experiences sexual desire towards a much younger prepubescent person, they should always distance themselves and seek help, because it is a sign of a serious problem. is our society pedophile when it eroticizes children? our society should neither eroticize children (such as mini miss contest, sexy clothes or makeup for little girls …) nor infantilize adults (prepubescent body shapes, absence of body hair …) our society prevents children from being children and adults from being adults when it erases the differences between the generations, and this causes serious confusion that can sometimes lead to the sexual assault of a child. a little girl dressed as a sexy woman (in tight clothing, miniskirts, short shorts, bikini …) can make us feel deeply uneasy; but if it arouses sexual excitement then you should take notice of this, and you should be aware that she is only playing at pretending to be an adult and that she is still a child. her clothing or behavior is never an invitation or an expression of sexual intent. is there a risk to look at photos or videos of naked children? masturbating while looking at photos or watching videos of children gets your brain used to needing an image of a child to achieve arousal. over time, you will need to see more and more of these images to get yourself excited, and before long you will feel the need to see images of naked children in explicit poses or being sexually assaulted. seeing photos or videos of abused children (child pornography, pedosexual content, infantile pornography …) makes you an accomplice to the attacks these children are being subjected to when making such images or movies. when you view these image – even when you don’t pay for them and when you don’t share them – you are involved in an economic system that encourages the production of these images, and ther
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